Robin

Hello! So in the book Auditioning by Joanna Merlin, she talks about how it is almost impossible to tell whether or not you will get a part. You may feel like you had a great audition and never hear anything, or you may think you have a terrible audition and get the part. I had never had an experience with this. For the first two films I was cast in, and all of the films I wasn't cast in, my guess was usually pretty close.

However, I am pleased to announce that I WAS cast in the role of ROBIN in the student film in Chicago!

I really did not think I would be cast, so this is quite exciting for me. It is a much larger role than I have ever played before. I am actually nervous about memorizing my lines because I am out of the habit.

Right now I am still waiting to receive the script, but they hope to start filming soon. I have FINALLY finished reading the first half of The Power of the Actor by Ivana Chubbuck, so I am excited to analyze my script using her 12 steps.

ANYWAY,

I have a habit of watching my videos OVER AND OVER again.
In some ways I think this is a good thing, especially when it comes to performances. I think it is important to critique my own work, to be both my own biggest fan, and my own biggest critic. Watching my Transfers audition for the 1000th time I see which parts of my performance worked and which parts really didn't. I have also learned more about filming my own audition. I am both super proud of my performance, and super mortified. I think it is great... and I think it is horrible.

No matter what though, I plan to post more videos of me doing scenes and monologues, not to show off my talent, but to discover my weaknesses.

I have watched a LOT of Youtube videos of readings by others. There are some people who have posted several videos, but don't seem to have improved in their performance over the years of performing. Their performances fall flat, meanwhile, their video blog posts are completely engaging and make me want to watch more of them. I hope I don't fall into a rut like that. I want to look back at old performances and see how I have improved as a performer. I want to make progress.

I wish I had videos of myself performing when I first decided to be an actress. I like to believe my performances have improved. There was one particular Youtuber who reminds me of myself when I was younger. She managed to move to LA and pursue an acting career, and she is doing a great job going to classes and putting herself out there. Part of me is jealous that I wasn't able to do that when I was younger, but another part of me thinks that staying at home and dwelling on the craft has been good for me. Now I know, because of my 8 years of devotion that this is something I really want to do, for both good and bad reasons.

Good reasons:
-I love acting
-I love the abandon I experience when being someone else
-I love how each role teaches me about myself, as a performer and as a person.
-I love reading and learning about acting almost as much as I like performing itself.

Bad reasons:
-..ok so I love attention
-I would love to date one of todays many dreamy actors

So I will talk to you later!

Self-help must precede help from others. Even for making certain of help from heaven, one has to help oneself.

-Moraji R. Desai